______________________________NUKEVILLE

NUKES . . .

aren't just for breakfast anymore!

{a modest proposal}

I have come up with a logical, practical, and ethical solution for one of the most pressing unsolved long-term problems facing the modern scientific and political establishment: what to do with NUCLEAR WASTE!

THE FACTS:
  1. In the United States of America today, despite our technological prowess, we have no method for the disposal of our ever-accumulating nuclear waste. {The common industry practice is to store waste on-site, that is, all the waste being generated in nuclear reactors is being thrown into temporary holding areas on the grounds of the power plants, awaiting some future disposal solution.} This is a national embarassment, not just a health hazard, and a catastrophe waiting to happen.

  2. It is unethical to expose anyone to nuclear radiations without their consent.

  3. HORMESIS: a theory, popular among the proponents of nuclear energy, that exposure to low levels of ionizing radiation is good for you. While this is just a theory, with no conclusive evidence to support it, it is a valid belief, or faith. (note: this theory nicely obviates the ethical dilemma noted above, by claiming benefits, rather than deaths for exposure to low levels of ionizing radiation.)
THE SOLUTION:

A voluntary program of nuclear waste ingestion. Those people who believe that radiation can be good for you should be given the opportunity to be exposed. Anyone who does not consent to exposure will not be forced to participate.

COROLLARIES:

. . . . NUKEVILLE_________________________ s2_|||>
May 1997